They say too much of a good thing can be bad for you. This is true. The amount of coffee that will fill your blood stream is doomed to come out of you at the end. You know which one I'm referring to...
Last week, after Monday's last day critiques on our projects, I went on a journey of a thousand sleepless nights to complete my project at whatever health risks or costs would be necessary. The idea of soul selling was discussed late one night.
Distractions. A horrible amount had swept over me. The worst of all was fear and doubt because I did not truly believe my project to be good. Yes, I've been dreading working on it and "Fixing it" was not the right direction. It was not even possible. So I worked on the drawings for two days as I waited for my package of 36"x24" Mylar sheets and basswood rods to arrive. When they did, I was already collapsing from the sleep deprivation that was causing a number of issues on my body, and my mind.
The cost is way too high! There has to be a better way to get that amount of work done without sacrificing health points!
Thursday sneaked upon me like its demonic brother, Monday. And I forced myself to sleep in so I could recuperate from the previous nights. This would cost me dearly, as the professor has sent an email asking a select few of us to go to class and gets critiques from the other professors.
This would not be helpful in the near future.
Monday arrived, dreadfully, as I was terrified to know that I had not finished what I started. Missing drawings, the site was taped together, the site looked pink instead of beige, and I had not prepared what I was going to say.
I rushed to get the floor plans done, rather than have them missing.
I was presenting 4th in the lineup. Our guest critics: Angela Amoia and a man who spoke mostly about the drawings and the amount of time it would take him to make some of the models.
He was nice.
However, I began to speak, and what I said, I might regret...
"Good morning, my name is Yehuda Mann, and today... I will be talking about my project." As I started pacing from side to side in front of them, as I strangely started to pick up from the midreview.
I told them that I went through a short list of designs, and quickly jumped into what I knew. What was familiar.
My own home. Bedrooms upstairs, public spaces in the middle, and a basement for storage and the Mason's studio.
The man truly loved the gathering space's design. But things quickly began to go South as he asked more and more questions that I could not answer because I was unprepared. I was sweating underneath my sweater. Luckily, I do not blush. Drymouth still happens though, but not as often as the sweat.
Professor Nizan began to interject as to steer the conversation to what she believed my project was about. But this did not help. At all. The reason being because what I believed to be the focus of my project was not the focus she believed.
This was due to our limited number of desk critiques. Yep, I'm going there.
Professor Amoia, conversely, gave me the most amazing advice again. I mean, she was a guest critic last semester with Professor Greta Weil. [I truly hope I have Amoia as my professor next semester, she I can get along with.]
Her advice was to remove myself from the familiar, as I had done in the first project, so to remove the boundaries of the imagination. A completely similar but opposite rule in writing.
She also mentioned putting figures in my drawings and taking more time to draw them.
The man said similar, that he knows I'm smart, but I need to work on time management because he wants to see the simple complexities that were present in my first project.
He also gave a short lecture on not putting tape on my site. I would automatically be fired from a firm if that happened.
This, and more, gave me nightmares the first night after. I will not repeat this. Ever.
What I do need, is a lesson in confidence, and creativity. Or maybe just some sleep.
Anyway, thanks from hearing me out, dear reader ;)
~ArchiTalmud
